Motherly Love Means Following Through

Sometimes loving your child means helping them learn boundaries, and following through with your discipline plan, even when it's hard or not convenient.

Yesterday we went to the grocery store and the kid through a fit. Not one of his normal "I want my way" fits he's had in stores before, but a knock-down, drag-out, "I'm going to make sure everyone in this store knows I'm pissed" kind of fit.

He took cupcakes off the shelf in the bakery and threw them on the floor. He threw down the bag of chocolate chips he had been carrying for me. He fell to the floor in a crumpled heap numerous times. But I never let go of his hand, no matter how loud he screamed "Let go Mommy!!!"

Oh, believe me, I know that people were staring, and I really don't let that bother me. I know all the child develeopment manuals say to leave your things and walk out of the store, but I've never been one to do that; if he wants to throw a fit, so be it. So I made my way to the register, screaming and kicking child in tow, and proceeded to pay for my two items, while the sales person at the next register looked at me with big puppy dog eyes, and said "You doin' ok, Mom?" I'm just peachy thanks. Then she whispers, "Do you want a sucker just to get him to stop crying?" Um, no.

I had already given him his choices of stopping his behavior or getting time out when we got home...he cried and screamed all the way out into the parking lot. Once in the car, he stopped. The five minute drive home was pretty quiet. As I unbuckled his carseat, I told him to go inside and sit down in his spot. To my surprise, he did it! No screaming, no crying, no yelling, no tantrum of any kind. I started his timer and he sat for his five minutes, very quietly.

When his timer went off, he got up, walked over to me, and said, "I sorry I yelled Momma." I hugged him, and kissed him; we talked briefly about his punishment, then he took my hand and asked me to read stories. I happily obliged.

"Some mothers are kissing mothers and some are scolding mothers,

but it is love just the same, and most mothers kiss and scold together."

- Pearl S. Buck